Being held captive in my home by sodding JOHOs

[Bayside Blue]

Escaped to my computer upstairs.

Yesterday two of them came round whilst i was downstairs on the computer, they rang the bell but i just ignored them in plain sight and kept doing what i was doing. After 3 minutes of knocking on my window they ****ed off. As i am so bored of answering the door and saying no i'm not religious i base my views on science and then being told oh we have a leaflet for that... TARDS!

NOW THERES 5 OF THEM OUT THERE. 3 women and 2 men ONE CARRYING A STUPID BIG BIBLE.

Nobody has rang the bell yet... BUT if they do i'll blow my rag at them... IF i wanted to be a sodding joho, i'd become one i don't need twats coming round like double glazing sales men trying to force off their unwanted goods.

I might even get nasty and meantion the woman they let die the other month because she wasn't allowed a simple blood transfusion because of her petty husbands religion and have a go at them for that ****ing disgusting people. BRING YOURSELVES OUT OF THE SODDING STONE AGE.

****ing ****s!

[speedfreek]

aaaand breeathe lol

I agree though - they are bloody annoying.

[JJ]

lmao!!! Kick them out!!!!

[Wolvreen]

Say you worship the devil and beckon them inside, asking them kindly to remove all their clothing.

[Bayside Blue]

Say you worship the devil and beckon them inside, asking them kindly to remove all their clothing.

Dude the two ladies yesterday were grandmas! Maybe if they were hot young things. I wouldn't be so afraid of answering the door. I'd convert them to dirty ho's

[Teggers]

Say you worship the devil and beckon them inside, asking them kindly to remove all their clothing.

Then invite them into the cellar (or back room if you don't have a cellar) where there is a pentagram drawn on the floor in ketchup with large candles at each point...

[Si-PS13]

Years ago when I was at uni, after a particularly harsh night out my housemate who was still way up in the clouds invited a bunch of JOHOs in for a chat After a couple of hours of him talking absolute jibberish about evolution and scientology they actually apologised and said they had to leave Never saw them again

[ben8000]

my dad answers every time and trys to convert them back. quite funny listening as he prepares all his arguments well and they really have no idea how to respond to reasoned debate, they just spout joho intolerance all the time. try it

[sideways14a]

Waz and poop into a bucket and when they come to the door, pour it out the upstairs window.
If you dont have an upstairs window handy for then i tend to find (hows about fvcking off) tends to do the trick.

[Bayside Blue]

Lol could go on the windup i suppose.

Might go let down there tyres lol they came in 2 cars But then they'd be stuck outside my house.

[MisterAdam]

I had some pestering me a couple of weeks ago while I was working on my car on the drive way, one said "Ohhhh thats a pretty engine", then started telling me about some better future and all this bollocks, i'd of told her to f**k off but im not that rude, I just ignored everything she said until she got the hint and left instead

[Bayside Blue]

just noticed from my upstairs window one of their cars isn't displaying a tax disc.

CRIMINAL BIBLE BONKING FRAUDSTERS

Should have them towed away.

[GrahamB]

My mum normally enjoys a good rant at them

(Mum's a church going Catholic and enjoys nothing more than pulling apart their Bible based beliefs )

[Bayside Blue]

Need some tips from you mum Graham!

Car with no tax has driven away somewhere. Theres 1 car still here though.


Still drives me nuts they have a leaflet for everything. usally on cheap nasty paper with a load of wildlife (relevent) drawn on front

Oh no, i enjoying having sex with animals... Oh we have a leaflet for that. "having sex with animals and being a johova witness can work!"

[Si-PS13]

just noticed from my upstairs window one of their cars isn't displaying a tax disc.

CRIMINAL BIBLE BONKING FRAUDSTERS

Should have them towed away.

Do it do it

[GrahamB]

Check it out Martin HERE

[Jibber]

water upstairs bucket window of from cold

[gomms13]

i've become quite good at saying "no thanks" and shutting the door in there face,or mentioning the words blood transfusion
however when in the mood for light entertainment you can have a pretty good wind up with them
tell them to leave you there home address and that you will "pop round when you have had a think",at a convenient time like when there having dinner,on the phone or busy trying to get the car going

[kkydd]

My dads nextdoor neighbours are joho's but they are decent people and keep to themselves.

I had some round yesterday, saw them coming up the street so made sure that I had some porn on the 40" screen in the livingroom which you can clearly see walking down my drive, had the sound turned up with the window slighty open, funny how they got about halfway down the driveway did an about turn and fooked off.

[Scougar]

I think the point of Jehovah's witness's is that it is based on the bible, much like a film is based on a true story. More than often it is more artistic license than truth in those films.

If you do your research you will find they had to alter the bible so that it fit their believes as such. The bible they carry is NOT the bible as such, it is a bastardised version.

Point 1 (for example): They believe they will be ruling in Heaven along with God, but fail to realise (or perhaps ignore) the fact that with that is the limit of around 144,000 people. Now fine, if there were only 144,000 past and present Jehovah Witnesses. Now the only problem is that those 144,000 people are already there, i.e. People from Israel in the old testament. It also doesn't say in the erm... regular bible that anyone will rule with God/Jehovah except those as part of the Trinity (i.e. God/Jesus/Holy Spirit).

But anyway...

I normally invite them in or listen to what they have to say. It gets them off the streets A bit like scientology, mislead (and I except that people don't think that any religion is correct as such so not trying to pimp Christianity).

Matthew