Our porch and conservatory get turned frequently into 'Land Rover Workshop'Originally Posted by Jonny Wilkinson
Our porch and conservatory get turned frequently into 'Land Rover Workshop'
34 year together 30yrs married next year and we bikker weekly argue monthy and lose it totaly on average every 18mths
And now we are going into buisness together from the 1st wk in Jan that should open up a whole new world of pain
Plus she is increadbly sexy when infull flow
a bit Valkyrie in fact
Proper argument maybe twice a year, daily petty normal marriage stuff on top of that. We're both stubborn, she's an angry redhead and I'm difficult to live with at the best of times so we do alright considering!
If youre both Italian or something then maybe but we dont have any relationship problems and I dont think we have had a decent blue in 15 years ............. it helps that one of us has horizontal levels of laid back and the other one doesnt seem to be able to get angry without laughing, but probably the biggest thing is that we both realise it doesnt get you anywhere - took her a couple of years maybe but she soon realised that I wasnt going to rise.
Its part of a relationship but if its always one person starting it, always the same subject and always the same one of you that walks off then you might want to have a bit of a think.
I get the feeling that this would only work if we could pursuade Ernest Borgnine to drive the Isle of Wight to Portsmouth hovercraft.
You should argue with your car more than you argue with your mrs... If you don't, then might i suggest spending some more time with your car...
What about on the drive and all over the back garden?
So if you don't argue, then you are apathetic towards each other?
Don't agree. You don't have to argue with someone to be passionate. I wind her up and she winds me up but it's all in good fun. Arguing rarely achieves anything other than making each other miserable in my experience. I don't want to be in a relationship where I have to tolerate being a bit miserable periodically, that's more damaging if you ask me.
With reasoning like that, I'm surprised your Mrs hasn't stabbed you in the eyes with a sharp pen
I said "I see it..." and "as part of a passionate relationship..." meaning its my opinion regarding passionate relationships.
People change over time and the chances of couples coming together, leading lives on parallel paths to the end without putting any effort in is about nil, IMO.
Instead, most couples have to work at keeping the relationship on track and that means (amongst other things) sorting out your differences. Arguments are one way to sort out your differences.
If you can't be arsed to sort out your differences they'll fester. If you can't be bothered to work at the relationship, it will die.
So, I maintain that apathy is worse for a relationship than healthy argument because healthy argument is a symptom of passion and the opposite of passion is apathy.
How you get from that to "You have to fight or you're apathetic" I don't know.
Never understood wummin, they donk think logically, dont think about circumstance, dont think about situation and generally just dont bloody think.
Then after a massive rant they blame it on hormones.. i mean FFS.. i piddle on the toilet floor and blame it on beer and get shot down in flames!!!
Mad feckers.
Easy, she sees it the same way. When you've come from a highly abusive relationship I should think that not wanting to get into an argument is quite easy. Equally, you don't have to argue to resolve issues.With reasoning like that, I'm surprised your Mrs hasn't stabbed you in the eyes with a sharp pen
Not a leap at all, without further clarification.
Sorting differences out is not the same thing as having an argument. Not even close.
I bet you don't like making sweeping generalisations either
Cause and effect.
Having an argument is one way of sorting out your differences.
It is not the only way.
It is a way.
That you choose not to argue simply limits your options for resolving your differences by one.
It also depends on your definition of argue.
For some, argue= lively debate. For others, argue= knocking lumps off one another. For others still, it is a one-sided process.
Personally, I couldn't have a long-term relationship with someone I couldn't raise my voice to. I wouldn't want to be in one where they didn't shout back.
Just saying.
They cant bloody reverse eitherI bet you don't like making sweeping generalisations either
its ok... my hobby is dogging!
What happened to this forum, there's only talk about politics and relationships now
Y'all realise that women actually love drama and emotional situations? Why do you think they watch that Eastenders crap daily, it's basically 30 minutes of people screaming at each other.
Petty stuff shouldn't be taken too seriously and turned into a joke if possible, although women can say some incredibly hurtful stuff in the heat of the moment and forget they said it by the next day... You may not be so lucky to forget it
In the end women like men to be men (no, not in the modern "lad" sense). As long as you're treating her well and not being a douche, your conscience is clear and you should coolly/calmy stand your ground*
*Results may vary. Always read the label. Written quotations on request. Your home is at risk if you...
If nothing's good enough for her, you're constantly having to back down or apologise over everything and you're not even having make-up sex, then it's just not meant to be.
Interesting reading. Everyones character's different and it's about learning and working in harmony with a partner. That means ironing out any differences you may have. I personally would say not from aggressive and regular arguing - that takes a lot of effort and strain that could be better spent elsewhere. Not pissing the other half off on purpose and not being generally lazy in the relationship I would say are the keys to longevity.
I have never had an argument with her ... occasionally one of takes something the wrong way and has a little dig with a sarky comment or sulks ..... but thats easily attributed to being grumpy in general about something i.e. crap day at work or not eaten enough in my case ..... neither one of us takes offence at it as we know it for what it is and doesn't escalate the situation by retaliating
That said though .... if she leaves the dirty spoon out on the counter one more time instead of putting it in the empty fcuking dishwasher, then I am likely to put her fcuking head in the dishwasher
Yeah but redheads are so worth it.
Every time I open my mouth
Only time I can remember the missus getting a bit upset was when I wanted to catch something on tv that was only on for 30 minutes. I sure you have all been through this scenario.
I sat quietly through all her usual crap soaps and then when it was my turn she started yapping about something so I asked her if she could wait until the ad break. As usual she continued, so I asked her again, she started up again so I picked up the remote and switched the tv off, looked at her and said "What?" at which point she said " you know you can be really nasty at times I'm not speaking to you" at which point I said "Good!" and put the tv back on
Other than that just the odd niggle but nothing serious.
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