Nathan_200sx
22-06-2001, 09:53
On a blanket from Taiwan: NOT TO BE USED AS PROTECTION FROM A TORNADO. (Bugger, what am I gonna use now???)
On a helmet-mounted mirror used by American cyclists: REMEMBER, OBJECTS IN THE MIRROR ARE ACTUALLY BEHIND
YOU.
On a Taiwanese shampoo: USE REPEATEDLY FOR SEVERE DAMAGE.
On the bottle-top of a British flavoured milk drink: AFTER OPENING, KEEP UPRIGHT.
On a New Zealand insect spray: THIS PRODUCT NOT TESTED ON ANIMALS.
In an American guide to setting up a new computer: TO AVOID CONDENSATION FORMING, ALLOW THE BOXES TO WARM UP
TO ROOM TEMPERATURE BEFORE OPENING. (Sensible, but the instruction was INSIDE the box.)
On a packet of American Sunmaid raisins: WHY NOT TRY TOSSING OVER YOUR FAVOURITE BREAKFAST CEREAL?
On an American Sears hairdryer: DO NOT USE WHILE SLEEPING.
On a bag of American Fritos-brand Corn Chips: YOU COULD BE A WINNER! NO PURCHASE NECESSARY. DETAILS INSIDE.
(The shoplifter's special!)
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of the box): DO NOT TURN UPSIDE DOWN. (Too late! You lose!)
On a Korean kitchen knife: WARNING: KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN. (Dammit! Who are they to tell me what to do with my kids?)
On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights: FOR INDOOR OR OUTDOOR USE ONLY. (As opposed to use in outer space?)
------------------
Nathan
Red S13 Mongoose, K&N T3 280ish BHP http://mysmilies.com/smilies/cwm30.gif
Empty bank account
On a helmet-mounted mirror used by American cyclists: REMEMBER, OBJECTS IN THE MIRROR ARE ACTUALLY BEHIND
YOU.
On a Taiwanese shampoo: USE REPEATEDLY FOR SEVERE DAMAGE.
On the bottle-top of a British flavoured milk drink: AFTER OPENING, KEEP UPRIGHT.
On a New Zealand insect spray: THIS PRODUCT NOT TESTED ON ANIMALS.
In an American guide to setting up a new computer: TO AVOID CONDENSATION FORMING, ALLOW THE BOXES TO WARM UP
TO ROOM TEMPERATURE BEFORE OPENING. (Sensible, but the instruction was INSIDE the box.)
On a packet of American Sunmaid raisins: WHY NOT TRY TOSSING OVER YOUR FAVOURITE BREAKFAST CEREAL?
On an American Sears hairdryer: DO NOT USE WHILE SLEEPING.
On a bag of American Fritos-brand Corn Chips: YOU COULD BE A WINNER! NO PURCHASE NECESSARY. DETAILS INSIDE.
(The shoplifter's special!)
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of the box): DO NOT TURN UPSIDE DOWN. (Too late! You lose!)
On a Korean kitchen knife: WARNING: KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN. (Dammit! Who are they to tell me what to do with my kids?)
On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights: FOR INDOOR OR OUTDOOR USE ONLY. (As opposed to use in outer space?)
------------------
Nathan
Red S13 Mongoose, K&N T3 280ish BHP http://mysmilies.com/smilies/cwm30.gif
Empty bank account