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View Full Version : I am sooooo bored...


BanjoMaster
05-03-2003, 15:47
I'm going to be stuck in front of this computer for the next three hors doing a stupid pointless CFD assignment. Somebody please distract me before I stick the head in the guy next to me and cram his stupid little mobile phone up his arse!

His life is in your hands...
Chris_Lacey
05-03-2003, 16:07
Keeeeel heeeeem... keeeeeeeeeeeel heeeeeeeeeem.
BanjoMaster
05-03-2003, 16:14
...and now he's dead.

But now I have a new problem; his lifeless eyes keep staring at me when I'm trying to do my work! The horror, the horror...
Chris_Lacey
05-03-2003, 16:17
Find a compass or other sharp utensil and pull the eyes out of the socket...

Alternativelypush his lifeless corpse under a moving vehicle, thus providing entertainment, and an alibi.
BanjoMaster
05-03-2003, 16:23
Good call, but I'm in a computer lab in uni. I might take him down to the workshops and see if they have any machines that will mash him into a small cube. In fact, I wonder what happens when you put a corpse in an autoclave?
Chris_Lacey
05-03-2003, 16:26
Not entirely sure... however, if you smash all the teeth out and scatter them, you could use a pottery kiln to make him unidentifieable.....
BanjoMaster
05-03-2003, 16:29
I think I'll go and try feed his body through the fan of a wind tunnel. That should do the trick!
Chris_Lacey
05-03-2003, 16:38
Sounds cunning, don't forget to stand well clear, and wear a mack.
BanjoMaster
05-03-2003, 16:42
*Draws in air through teeth*

The cleaners are not going to like me at all. Look at the mess he's made!
Chris_Lacey
05-03-2003, 16:47
Just add a couple cans of kidney beans, some green peppers and a few pots of chille powder, they'll think that a load of students just got p1ssed up and had a curry, and they're cleaners, there job is to clean up mess.. I never understand why hey complain.. I mean, if I have to sort out a server I don't say, no sorry, you've bolloxed this server too much, and it's not reasonable. You just get on and do it don't you, and the same for bin men, IT'S YOUR JOB PICK THE BINS UP.. I DONT CARE IF THEY CONTAIN SOME NON SANCTIONED LITTER. HOUSEHOLD WASTE ONLY??? IT ALL CAME FROM MY HOUSE. NOW F*CK OFF AND DO YOUR JOB.

Bah...

Basically, don't worry about the cleaners :)
BanjoMaster
05-03-2003, 16:59
Yeah, and posties, bus drivers and taxi drivers too. Moan, moan, bloody moan! Don't like it? THEN QUIT!

I like this curry idea, but how do I explain the bits of clothes and hair and stuff? Will a simple cleaner notice?
milo
05-03-2003, 17:12
When the old rigger's set in, you could turn him upside down and mould him into a kind of retro pen holder.

No one will notice :D
Phil L
05-03-2003, 17:34
:eek: at this thread
MattyGee
05-03-2003, 18:49
ROFL :D quality stuff guys :)