Bigtone
10-07-2004, 12:04
It's time once again to review the winners of the annual "Stella Awards".
The Stella's are named after 81-year-old Stella Liebeck who spilled coffee
on herself and successfully sued McDonalds.
That case inspired the Stella awards for the most frivolous successful lawsuits in the United States.
Unfortunately, the most recent lawsuit implicating McDonalds, the teens who allegethat eating at McDonalds have made them fat, was filed after the 2003 award voting was closed.
The following are this year's winners:
5th Place (tie): Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas, was awarded $780,000 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were understandably surprised at the verdict,
considering the misbehaving little toddler was Ms. Robertson's son.
5th Place (tie): A 19-year-old Carl Truman of Los Angeles won $74,000
and medical expenses when his neighbour ran over his hand with a Honda Accord.
Mr. Truman apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel
of the car when he was trying to steal his neighbor's hubcaps.
5th Place (tie): Terrence Dickson of Bristol, Pennsylvania, was leaving
a house he had just finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not able to get the garage door to go up since the automatic door opener wasmalfunctioning.
He couldn't re-enter the house because the door connecting the house
and garage locked when he pulled it shut. The family was on vacation, and
Mr. Dickson found himself locked in the garage for eight days. He subsisted on a case of Pepsi he found, and a large bag of dry dog food. He sued the
homeowner's insurance claiming the situation caused him undue mental anguish. The jury agreed to the sum of $500,000.
4th Place: Jerry Williams of Little Rock, Arkansas, was awarded $14,500 and
medical expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next door
neighbour's beagle. The beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced yard.
The award was less than sought because the jury felt the dog might have been just a little provoked at the time by
Mr. Williams who was shooting it repeatedly with a pellet gun.
3rd Place: A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson
of Lancaster, Pennsylvania, $113,500 after she slipped on a soft drink
and broke her coccyx. The beverage was on the floor because Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument.
2nd Place: Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware, successfully sued the
owner of a night club in a neighboring city when she fell from the bathroom
window to the floor and knocked out her two front teeth. This occurred while
Ms.Walton was trying to sneak through the window in the ladies room to
avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge. She was awarded $12,000 and dental expenses.
1st Place: This year's run away winner was Mr. Merv Grazinski of Oklahoma
City, Oklahoma.
Mr. Grazinski purchased a brand new 32-foot Winnebago
motor home. On his first trip home, (from an OU football game), having
driven onto the freeway, he set the cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left
the drivers seat to go into the back and make himself a cup of coffee.
Not surprisingly, the R.V. left the freeway, crashed and overturned.
Mr.Grazinski sued Winnebago for not advising him in the owner's manual that 'cruise control' would not actually drive the vehicle for him.
The jury awarded him $1,750,000 plus anew motor home.
(The company actually changed their manuals on the
basis of this suit, just in case there were any other complete morons
buying their recreation vehicles).
:smash: :rolleyes: :smash: :rolleyes:
The Stella's are named after 81-year-old Stella Liebeck who spilled coffee
on herself and successfully sued McDonalds.
That case inspired the Stella awards for the most frivolous successful lawsuits in the United States.
Unfortunately, the most recent lawsuit implicating McDonalds, the teens who allegethat eating at McDonalds have made them fat, was filed after the 2003 award voting was closed.
The following are this year's winners:
5th Place (tie): Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas, was awarded $780,000 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were understandably surprised at the verdict,
considering the misbehaving little toddler was Ms. Robertson's son.
5th Place (tie): A 19-year-old Carl Truman of Los Angeles won $74,000
and medical expenses when his neighbour ran over his hand with a Honda Accord.
Mr. Truman apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel
of the car when he was trying to steal his neighbor's hubcaps.
5th Place (tie): Terrence Dickson of Bristol, Pennsylvania, was leaving
a house he had just finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not able to get the garage door to go up since the automatic door opener wasmalfunctioning.
He couldn't re-enter the house because the door connecting the house
and garage locked when he pulled it shut. The family was on vacation, and
Mr. Dickson found himself locked in the garage for eight days. He subsisted on a case of Pepsi he found, and a large bag of dry dog food. He sued the
homeowner's insurance claiming the situation caused him undue mental anguish. The jury agreed to the sum of $500,000.
4th Place: Jerry Williams of Little Rock, Arkansas, was awarded $14,500 and
medical expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next door
neighbour's beagle. The beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced yard.
The award was less than sought because the jury felt the dog might have been just a little provoked at the time by
Mr. Williams who was shooting it repeatedly with a pellet gun.
3rd Place: A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson
of Lancaster, Pennsylvania, $113,500 after she slipped on a soft drink
and broke her coccyx. The beverage was on the floor because Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument.
2nd Place: Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware, successfully sued the
owner of a night club in a neighboring city when she fell from the bathroom
window to the floor and knocked out her two front teeth. This occurred while
Ms.Walton was trying to sneak through the window in the ladies room to
avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge. She was awarded $12,000 and dental expenses.
1st Place: This year's run away winner was Mr. Merv Grazinski of Oklahoma
City, Oklahoma.
Mr. Grazinski purchased a brand new 32-foot Winnebago
motor home. On his first trip home, (from an OU football game), having
driven onto the freeway, he set the cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left
the drivers seat to go into the back and make himself a cup of coffee.
Not surprisingly, the R.V. left the freeway, crashed and overturned.
Mr.Grazinski sued Winnebago for not advising him in the owner's manual that 'cruise control' would not actually drive the vehicle for him.
The jury awarded him $1,750,000 plus anew motor home.
(The company actually changed their manuals on the
basis of this suit, just in case there were any other complete morons
buying their recreation vehicles).
:smash: :rolleyes: :smash: :rolleyes: